To Sara of Fit by Sara: “After having my second child I put on 15 pounds (on top of the 10 I never lost from my first child). Since putting on the extra weight I feel unattractive and undesirable. My husband always tells me I’m beautiful, but I don’t feel that way. In fact because I feel so unattractive I’ve lost interest in having sex. Any advice?”
From Fit by Sara: “Many moms feel the way you do. Lack of libido after having kids happens when we put on weight and feel unattractive plus we often have low energy from running around and having little sleep. Making small changes to your daily habits will result in a positive change in the way you feel. Start off by making time just for you. This may include simple pampering such as a warm bubble bath and soothing fragrant lotion or meeting with a girlfriend for lunch or coffee. Put on something that fits and you feel good in, put on some makeup and do your hair. Taking a little time on your appearance will improve the way you feel. Start exercising-the hardest part is getting started, just remember that even a 10 min. walk is a start. After you exercise really take in how good you feel…in just a couple of weeks of consistent exercise you’ll likely have more energy and an improved mood. Along with exercise, start fueling your body with food that will give you energy vs. making you feel worse. Ask yourself, “what food choice will give me the energy I need?” Most importantly realize that by making small changes you will improve the way you feel and this will result in an increase in self-esteem and libido.” –Sara Holliday MFT, CPT